index yesterday tomorrow Most Recent Entries A pound a day - 2006-04-08 Back in black - well in fat anyway - 2006-04-05 Too stupid for my own good - 2004-10-27 The debate - 2004-10-27 To lie or not to lie, that is the question - 2004-10-26 leave me a note

Oh My God! My husband came home while I was puking in the toilet! I tried to cover it up but he could tell from my red eyes! He was so angry... He yelled at me to just stop it. I am so ashamed! Now I can't eat any more. I have to be so, so, so good. He saw the evidence of me being a disgusting pig! The empty brownie box... I can't live this way. I have to stop, and I will. From here on out, I will not indulge in any more binging. Perfection only. That means sticking strictly to my plan. For today, NOTHING else to eat. NOTHING. Just calorie free fluid. From now on, if I mess up I have to be punished. If I succeed at todays plan, I will allow myself a weight watchers meal when I wake up tomorrow... I know that anyone who has been reading this will say yah right, you are a fat fucking bulimic cow and you say that you won't binge any more but then you always do... Fine. Say that to yourself. I will PICTURE you saying that. It will help me. I will prove you wrong. I will prove my husband wrong. I will prove the stupid girls in Subway wrong. I will get SO skinny that everyone turns from me in horror.... I will show them,you,him. Just wait...