index yesterday tomorrow Most Recent Entries A pound a day - 2006-04-08 Back in black - well in fat anyway - 2006-04-05 Too stupid for my own good - 2004-10-27 The debate - 2004-10-27 To lie or not to lie, that is the question - 2004-10-26 leave me a note

I screwed up at work. I said I was going to start this job out right. I was going to be happy, and motivated, impress my boss and get along with my coworkers. Yah right. Why do I set myself up? I am just not cut out for this job. It bothers me when the patients get mad at me for bugging them. I feel like running away and crying when the doctors treat me like I am stupid. I can't remember to chart everything that needs to be charted, I left my med keys stuck in the drawer twice this week. I whined when Dr. Oakley was rude on the phone. I complained about the schedule I have, and I have only been doing this schedule for a week! My preceptor is going to recommend MORE orientation. I feel like such a failure. The other new grad nurses that started with me have been on their own for a week now! I am so ashamed! People are already asking why I am still on orientation, they will know that I am incompetant when I am STILL on it next week! I just graduated, I should be enjoying work. I hate it. This is what I spent 20,000 bucks for... and I hate it. I don't want to work. I am too much of a loser to work. I can't function in the real world. I am to weak. I am too sick. I am a waste of life, a waste of skin.